A Light (and Owl Goddess) in the Darkness

“How do you see in the dark, Holly?”

“I have felt the sweetness of spirit blowing gently as a conscious wind across my cheek and I will not trade this stillness of mind and freedom of heart for all the world of stuff and consequence.” - The Joyful Warrior

*Previously published March of 2010

I just stood there. In blackness. For that is how I felt. Like all that I had found and created in my garden of spirit – was gone. And I couldn’t access it. And I couldn’t bring it to me. And I couldn’t see. So I thought to myself, asked myself, “what could I trust?” And then it came to me that there would be a light. The light of a candle. This is something I could trust, in the dark. So in my hands there did appear a small candle. And for a long time I just stood there looking at this.

I didn’t know what else to do. Just look at the light. This felt right. This felt true. This felt like the “safe” thing to do. The thing that I could hold onto. And then, beautifully, and on cue – there appeared a large owl’s shadow over the light looking back at me.

Of course. Still, waiting, patiently. And so began a new journey in the shaman’s territory.

“How do you see in the dark, Holly?” She asked. As the owl took on a woman’s vibration and a goddess’s tone of voice.

“With your heart” I said. “When your heart is open, the light shines through, and then you can see in the dark.”

“Yes…” the Owl, said.

“And how do you open your heart?” she said. “Do you remember?

“Yes, I can sing.” I said, as a statement and a question at the same time.

“Then sing.” the Owl Goddess, said.

So I started to sing my power song. And as I sang, visions of those people and those places which I loved and wished to bless – to acknowledge the spirit of – came flashing across my vision and my heart opened and opened and I sang and sang. And I thought, somewhere in the middle of this how this song originated as a melody heard in my heart, just for me. To remind me, if I got lost, how to find my way home. My way back to the light of divine connectivity.

I realized then that I could stare at a candle all I wished but if my heart is not open, I will find no guidance there. The light that shines forth to guide my way when I am in need of guidance and to warm my bones when they are brittle and bare, is the one that comes through me when I care. And to console my soul when it feels lost and alone, it is for me to sing a song of gratitude for what I cannot see that is already there. And remember the feeling of the presence of my soul and my spirit form as a bird flying free on the wind. Which is how I understand my spirit to be and to feel when she it truly free.

It was a short journey. Just what I needed to remind me.

It’s ok to look a little awkward when your learning how to fly again…